Tuesday, January 19, 2010

A Contest

In honor of this wonderful day with my bickering girlz, I am having my first contest. I was at Claire's searching for some cheap goodies, and I happened up this. I was so thrilled with them that I bought all 7 that they had. I gifted my god daughters with them and gave my girlz one. And now there is one for one lucky reader. It is a short chain and the nesting doll is very small. Big enough to see, but small enough to wear without being cumbersome.

(Sorry about the photo quality, my camera isn't so great on super close ups)

I cannot guarantee how long it will stay bright and sparkly, but I can promise this cute little necklace will make any gal smile!
All you have to do is leave a comment and answer this question.

"How do you make a 3 and 6 year old stop arguing and tattling?"

Who ever gives me advice that I can start using today, right now, will win. I will Announce a winner on next Tuesday January 26th. Or sooner if I read something that starts working TODAY! I will mail this little bit of deliciousness to where you live, whatever city, state, country, continent, Where Ever! Plus I may just put in a little extra treat if your magic ideas work without much effort from this tired momma!
(Can you tell I am completely over the tattling!!)


Jen Stevens said...

Well, let's see, some of my favorite tricks for tattling and fighting.
1 - each time they come to you (cuz they always do) have them say 3 things they like about their sibling to their sibling
2 - have them be their siblings caretaker for an hour. Pick up toys after them, get their cup, you get the idea.

The thing I love about both of these ideas is that not only do they see some value in their sib, but they get so frustrated with the consequence that the fighting and tattling aren't worth it.

Good luck!!

Jojo, Julz, Julianne said...

ohhhh j you are winning so far!!!

Annie said...

And you're a teacher? What do you do at school? I do the same thing at home (and I am teasing you because, for some reason, I had to consciously practice my school skills on the home front). For some reason I was allowing myself to become more engaged in this stuff at home. (Love, I suppose!)

Anyway, I explained that the only time I wanted to hear them tell me something about a sibling was if it was one of the (for home use) two "D's" - Dangerous or Destructive. If it wasn't one of those, I was not going to listen, I didn't want to hear it. They needed to learn to work it out. And if being with a sibling was not pleasant, they could play by themselves, of course. And, I just turn deaf, don't answer, don't give eye contact when they come to me with a "story". Has worked great. They soon learned that there was no benefit whatsoever in telling me that sort of stuff - in fact, it was simply frustrating.

Of course, "working it out" has its problems in the beginning; they go back and take matters into their own hands. Occasionally, they'll work it out. But, if things accelerate, I may have to go in there and say - cool and detached - "You are not getting along; I guess you can't play together. I have some chores that need doing." And if things really are out of control, I will separate them myself. But, that is teaching a good strategy they can use on their own later: Sometimes you really DO just have to leave a situation! Sometimes people need time apart.

I noticed some actual matrioshkas at Claires! I came really close to buying one, but figured they wouldn't really "do" for the main reason I keep a drawer of matrioshkas (gifts for people) - I'd need real, Russian ones for that. I didn't see the necklaces, so I hope you like my advice.

Tina in CT said...

I saw the matrioshka things at my local Claire's and bought the girls the leather change purses on clearance in Dec. They were a big hit! They also had a card of pierced earrings and on it were three different pairs of matrioshka earrings. Adorable. Those are put away for when they earn getting their ears pierced. My daughter said they had the same things at the Claire's at the mall in Moscow but just at a higher price.

As for advice, I can't help as I had an only child. I know my daughter goes through the same issues with her two girls.

Really cute necklace.

Milena said...

Emergency advice: separate them, make them do different things in different rooms.

Long term advice: Make sure neither is hungry nor too tired. If they are, separate them before they even start arguing.

Try talking to both of them how you treat someone nicely and how they like to be treated themselves. It takes forever, but works in the long run.....

- I'm blogging for Nadya; to help her find a family -

Jen Stevens said...

Oh, I forgot my other favorite "punishment". Before they can tattle on the sib, they have to tell me 1 thing they did wrong today - after that I let them decide if they both deserve a consequence. Avery picked up pretty quick, that she was just as guilty and started giving some slack for little things, that like tina said weren't dangerous or destructive.

Boy fostering makes you pull out the big guns - or maybe it is just having SO many kids.

kate said...

i think your three-year-old gets a little more leeway here than your six-year-old. what huge developmental gap that is--three and six.

fighting--sit on the step together touching--holding hands, etc. or looking into each other's eyes--even nose to nose. this usually ends up with lots of giggles

tattling--ignore. disengage. or, just say, "thank you for telling me." and THEN disengage and walk away. very frustrating when tattling gets you nothing. unless there's blood (i like annie's dangerous or destructive, too) you don't want to hear it.

for either, you can ask, "do you want me to take care of this or can you work it out?" naturally, you taking care of it needs to be highly unpleasant. i don't know what your girls' currency is. knowing what's valuable to them, whether it's time alone with you, a new whatever, a special movie, etc. helps to make your consequences more meaningful.

are you a love and logic fan? i loooove them. loving and logical.

hope this is going directly to your e-mail!

Ursula said...

Yikes, I wish I could give you some great advice, however I dont have any children of my own yet. But I am taking notes. Good luck!!!!

Martinfamily4 said...

okay which Claire's did you go too - I seriously need these for Sammy Joy! (and some other little gals I k