Monday, May 30, 2011

Graduate School

I have been researching a program in StPeter. It seems perfect, and close to affordable.

It would roughly cost 2K to take a summer course and then the travel and lodging would be extra. In reality, I would love to take the yearly course. I have been in contact with an alum that attended the full program. He shared that later this year the program should qualify as a school that I can attend using US student loans. We shall see.

Thursday, May 26, 2011


Tiny Tillia 

So for the next few weeks, or possibly every so often, I am going to post a link to a product that either
B. Is cute and think it would make a great pressie for your gift closet
C. Is on sale and I think it is a great bargain

Now ya wondering why? Cause I am gonna raise some money for a trip to Russia. I have a plan, and in a few weeks, I will share it. But lets just say, I won't be moving, but have found a graduate program that is perfect. A program that I could afford. (The travel expenses are what I need help with!)

So look over these products and if you care to, pass them along to friends or family...If I could figue out a way to form a pyramid scheme, I'd soooo be doing it.!! Thanks, Love you all!

LeapFrog Enterprises Inc.

 NEW! Tag(tm) Reading System

This is something I Definately LOVE!
I wrote a grant and LeapFrog approved it. I received  a6 Tag Readers, a battery charger and a  GINORMOUS set of books. There were 6 copies of each book. They came with awesome little cases headphones. My kindergarteners adore these. TEACHERS, these take the place of your listening centers. No more kids having to squeeze their little bodies around ONE old tape player..OK OK, so I love this company. Order one or ten..I borrow 2 TagReaders each summer and my girlz use them from our home to Florida..Each title offers a read a loud mode, games, and sound/letter practice. There are tons of titles online and you can find a wide range of levels. I promise you will love this for your class or your own child..I checked at ToysRUs, and they don't have as many titles as you can find directly through LeapFrog online..So clickety click...

Tuesday, May 24, 2011


Just a little background vocals..
Wow..I just looked on the feed thingy and it says I have had nearly 15K hits on my blog..That is crazy.  I never imagine anyone reading my thoughts and ideas..I bet you think I am crazy to want to leave my home and go to Russia..I bet you think I have it made with a nice home and job, and all the trappings of suburban life..Well, just so ya know..I want more. And with that "more", I am willing to have less..I would share a 1 bedroom apartment with my girlz and live on Ramen noodles and diet coke if it meant giving my girlz their home country experience. I want my girlz to feel Russian. Weird I know. After literally traveling around the world to get my girlz to the Good Ole USA, I want to pack it in and go back..But you have to know, there is so much more than just going there..

Oh well, I will keep plotting and scheming!
Today is a good day..Kids are playing in the yard, and momma is sitting on the porch blogging..Honestly, there's nothing better than this

Hey all, just wanted to respond to your comments...
Firstly, No my girlz don't really want to go to Russia. I mean, they don't ask me to move there..But once I tell them, "Mommy will be with you at your school IF we were to move there" they do say they would want to go..But just for a little while..

And this part will be hard to explain..My girlz will never feel Russian. And as much I think they need to, they won't want to..BUT, when they are adults and in therapy for some crazy mess I have done, they will always be able to say, "My mother did everything in her power to give us a positive image of our birth country." But it's also about being able to show my girlz the world. I want my girlz to feel that the universe is there for them to experience. Of course their momma would be right by their side guiding them along the way...

I cannot explain this desire to go Back To Russia..I just can't. Adoption is giant. For me, International adoption, namely Russian adoption lit the desires that were buried deep within my soul. It gave ME back a sense of urgency to learn, to explore, and to be a part of a global community. Ordinary, became just that. Regular became just that. I have always loved new places. Moving to DC from Florida was amazing. I spent the first two years here, driving, getting lost. And then finding my way back home. Losing my way has always meant seeing something new. And Russia felt like the kind of place where I'd like to lose my way. In the end, I know that even in Russia, I can find my way back home..

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Options and Adentures

I have always said, "In order to truly move forward, sometimes you have to go back.." And I don't know how yet, but I am..I am going backwards, in the most radical way a family can..
I have learned so much about our family lately. I have learned about the way my girlz need and accept love. Thanks to the 5 Love Languages of Children. My girlz are very different. I would say radically, but I already said that.. I am just beginning the book, but HIGHLY encourage any parent to take a read...If you have children under 5, it won't be as useful yet, since very young ones require all five love languages..But for parents like me, who are currently int the season of struggle, it may just be a life saver..

As many of you know I am in need of a job change. The distance to my current school is just too great. I could handle the commute before I was a mom, and before the county changed the bell schedule. But now that both of my girlz will be in school, I need to be more available to be a part of their school experience. As it stands now, I can't make it to very many night events at either my school or the girlz school..Gas prices are killing my budget, and the stress and anxiety I feel during the drive each way is more than my current anti-depressant can handle..Being an early bird to most every event we attend, the unpredictable drive puts me nearly over the ...I know 5 or so minutes late doesn't seem to harsh, but for a chronicly early person, it is horrifying.

I had an interview at a school very close to my home...And never heard anything. The transfer deadline was Friday, so I look to read yet another, "thanks but no thanks" email any day now...I gave honest answers in the interview. I didn't give the answer they thought I should say..I was truthful. So not getting a job that in theory, I already have, sort of cracks me up.

So where does that leave us?
AAS in Moscow and StPeter have told me twice that I can't teach there. (I read their bylaws and although they won't pay for two dependents, they COULD hire me and allow me to pay the other fee)
But it's not gonna happen. I wrote a letter to the school's Board of Directors who is also the Deputy Chief of Mission at the Embassy in Moscow. Haven't sent it yet.. Wondering if I even should..

I can't get a job closer to home..

The Foreign Service is too hard a process to get into to. (let's just say I don't have the time or energy to study for a test..) The FSO can't promise an assignment anyway. The last thing I would want is to go through the hoops to get in only to find out I would have to work in South America some where...

The one option I haven't really investigated much is the idea of teaching in a Russian School. From Tamara I know that there are different challenges, but this would mean I could be with my girlz during the day..And although the salary isn't as it would be in an American School, it would be a guarantee..

The last option has come up a few times. But I have never thought it was very realistic. I am thinking about serving as a missionary in Russia. Now, we all know that I adore the Lord. BUT...I am a
"baby Christian" meaning I am still learning about the Lord and how to live a Christian life. I can't teach adults about coming to Christ..What I can do is teach the children of traditional missionaries. And there are a couple of schools in Russia that do just this. I would have to raise my own money to go, and I am thinking that I would be embarrassed to beg for money. The school in Moscow offers a 10K stipend, and would help find housing. Through research I think we could find a low rent apartment for about 2K a month. I would also rent out my house here in the states and could earn about 6K for the year after expenses. So I would be left to raise around 6K for housing.  I think I could easily beg my friends into giving me some frequent flyer miles for travel, leaving only our day to day expenses... I am researching the going rate for teaching english to children or young adults, and think that I could use that as our day to day expenses..
I have savings that would pay for emergencies.

I am willing to work hard to plan for an adventure that would Take Us Back..If you have any funding ideas, adoption agencies that would want an American in country, a Church willing to assist, or grants sources, please send them my way.. I am praying for the whole thing to work itself out, but if I know one thing, it's that Life is as clear as mud sometimes..

Saturday, May 14, 2011

A Party in the Garden..

AugustRose celebrated her 5th birthday party today. And it was glorious..The rain held off for just enough time to enjoy a tour of the garden center, a planting session, pizza, birthday cake and PREZZIES!! 

The children were lovely.
 The little ones on the end are my students. Although they just left our school. :(   They are such a nice family. The twins are adopted from Russia. So of course they are already like family!!
 This is the most beautiful flower ever...Looks just like a ballerina fairy...
 Some of the kiddies planting..They got to decorate the pots at the end..Adorable~

 I took this before putting the cake on the table..Yes, there was a cake!

 And yes, AugustRose is holding L's hand..This is the only toddler that AugustRose loves. She thinks she is "soo cute."  (I'd show ya, but her mom would rather keep her beauty all to herself!) :)

 AugustRose has never been so gracious. She was the perfect birthday girl...
And this is one of my teammates, with another ones baby! Aunti Maria is gonna be an awesome mom one day!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

I'm Failing..

I am sick as a dog. My body aches and I'm in tears.
My house is gross. Crap/junk/toys/shit everyone..My girlz are terrible lately. Fighting, arguing, crying, being defiant. And Anna is the fairing the worst. It's so bad, that I honestly think I need to go to a parenting class or counselor. She told her teacher that I loved AugustRose more than I love her..And you guys gotta know how hard this hurts. Especially considering that we had 3.5 years together to really establish a deeep love..She is lazy and won't help clean her messes. And it is making me horribly depressed. My mom doesn't even want to come here anymore because it seems that all the toys and stuff here makes the girlz argue and fuss. So she takes them to her house..

I am not being a good parent. I am so tired lately. My house is really bothersome. And schlepping my laundry down 2 flights of stairs means I don't do it the way I should. SO, I am always behind..

I need some encouragement friends. I am feeling very down. I am feeling like a big failure and the worst part, the part I am most ashamed of, is I want a little break..I wish I could just sleep all day and let my mom or Missi take my kids for a few days..Please say some of you have felt this way...

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Thanks But...

I got an email from AAS and it was nice, sharing that they got my resume and would contact me if they needed more info...Oh Well, I tried. Again.

And as for the two schools I am trying to transfer to, Nothing. A gal pal from my school got a call from one of them...She is willing to teach up to 3rd grade, and I am only trying for kindergarten.. Funny, I can't get an interview for a job I already have. She has 1/2 the years I have, but a great teacher!

Man, I am in a funk..And Anna is too..I'll share that on..Once I figure out how to get her through it. And this weekend is AugustRose's birthday party. We are having a garden party at a nursery..15 or so kiddies will come and plant flowers and have cake, and then we will celebrate the wonder that it my Auggieeee!!

Sunday, May 08, 2011


Although AAS said they would acknowledge each application, I haven't heard anything. They probably had to post the opening and had no intention of contacting anyone who sent resumes. It's ok. I sort of understood my chances were NIL when I sent the resume over...It would have been nice to be acknowledged. But who said manners were still alive in the business world?

I am on a "less than 30 day" countdown at school..I sent my resume to 2 schools that are closer to my home, and after the principals at each school reviews all of the resumes, the candidates that are going to be interviewed will get a call..Wow. I thought we would all get a chance to at least interview. It would be all but ironic if I couldn't get an interview in a system where I already have a job...Can't blame that on having too many kids~
If nothing happens, I will just go back and fight the commute another year. Graduate school is on the horizon, and there is a chance I could do a bit of travel during that..We'll have to see.

And here is the inside of my purse...I see other people posting this on their blogs so I thought I would too..I invite Anni and Tina, who read this blog to do the same!
What I see is:
Bug Repellan Wipe
Shamoo from Disney World
Bandaide Holder
D&G Light Blue Parfum
Space Shuttle Toy
Hersheys Kiss
Green Erase

Happy Mother's Day everyone! It's good to be celebrating with my kids..There is someone out there waiting to bring their child home from Russia, My heart is with you ...I know the wait is hard, but once that precious child is home, you find out the wait was the easiest part!!

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Because I HAD to...

So once again, I set myself up for failure..I applied for a job I saw online. A job I couldn't NOT apply for..A job I have already been told I couldn't have. But now, because I saw that AAS (International School in Moscow) is a Department of State supported school, I just felt like it was only fair that I be considered. I shared the truth about getting "CLOSE" in St. Petersburg, but shared that I wanted to be reconsidered, because of my extensive experience...
If nothing else, they will know I am persistent.

Let's see how long it takes to get a rejection email..

My team is being broken up next year..One of my team mates is being moved to 2nd grade. And we are heartbroken. It's like a divorce that no one wants. And now I am more convinced that it is time for me to make a change. And if not going to Russia, it is getting closer to home..
We'll see.